Our power is in the story...

Our power is in the story...


Our power is in the story we tell ourselves

One of the things that is most interesting to me is how our perspective shapes our experiences.

The story that I tell myself determines a lot about how I feel, how I act, and how I connect with others.  There are boundless examples of this. If I feel relaxed and happy, I smile at someone who looks stern in the grocery store, assuming they must be having a hard day.  When I feel cranky and hard on myself, I quietly pout about someone who looks stern in the grocery store, assuming they don't like me.  The only thing that changed was my narrative.

When I first moved to New York and was building my business from scratch I had a lot of discouraging days.  How I felt about my competence, likely success, etc. totally colored my daily experience.  For example, I sent what felt like 5 million introductory emails.  Some days I would get one response, and you would think I had won the lottery, I was skipping around my apartment singing "New York, New York." Some days I would get one response and be despondent about the state of grumpy humanity in NYC and feel certain that I would never achieve my goals. Note that the only difference in the two days was the story I told myself.

Almost always, how I feel is closely linked to the story I am telling myself.  Now, sometimes my negative interpretation is accurate - but usually it isn't. Most often reality is somewhere in the middle. However, when we approach life through the lens of possibility, assume good in others, create a space for the things we hope for - we are often quite pleasantly surprised.

What are you telling yourself on the regular? How does this make you feel.  What if you framed your accomplishments as good enough? Your small successes as meaningful? The grumpiness around you as about them and not you? What if…

"What we think, we become."

Buddha


Additional Food for Thought:

Here is some related reading ...

30 Positive Reframes

Two Kinds of Stories We Tell About Ourselves

Cognitive Restructuring

50 Favorite Words: #15 Daring (part 1)

50 Favorite Words: #15 Daring (part 1)

50 Favorite words - #14 Invigorate

50 Favorite words - #14 Invigorate